It started out like an innocent friendship. A smile here, a look there and you became friends. instantly. You used to hang out a lot together after work. You admired her personality and you became close. You found out she was dealing with some issues and offered her your help. You grew attracted to her but did not consider having a relationship with her.
One night however, while you were hanging out, ‘konji’ caught you. The setting was right and you were alone. The timing and every other thing wasn’t. She resisted at first but later gave in. and you had your way. Afterwards, you were sorry and apologized and repented. She forgave you and you promised it wouldn’t ever happen again.
You continued being friends but this time it was like she was not giving you space to breathe. You started to avoid her. To make excuses not to be with her. The more you ran away, the more she chased you. You were worried. You didn’t want her to think that the reason you were staying away from her because you had hit the ‘jack pot’. And yet her neediness was getting on your nerves. You couldn’t help it but she really didn’t seem so attractive anymore.
One day, when she invites you out and you brush her off, she says: “I see you’ve been trying to avoid me. If you continue behaving this way, I’ll let the whole office know that you raped me.”
You are aghast. Surely she wouldn’t do that, would she? It had been consensual at the end. The truth would come out. But she knew that by then, you would already be facing disciplinary action. A few years earlier before you had an encounter with Christ and before you met her, you had had a reputation of being a Don Juan. You had nearly had a scandal once with your former employer and had to lose your job. This lady was your first lapse since then. The new company had decided to give you a chance. If such a scandal were to happen again, you would definitely lose your job again. And which company would be willing to hire you again after that?
You’ve tried to play along with her, hoping to find a way out. You’ve taught of reporting her as mentally unstable but you are not sure who you can tell. She was a relative of your new employer. But you are worried because she seems to need you more and more and had once even threatened suicide if you tried to leave her. One night to prove she was serious; she gave herself a deep cut on her arm using a knife. You were in a fix. You couldn’t leave her because you would lose everything you’d worked for and you had no idea how she would react. You couldn’t stay with her because she was dangerous and you really didn’t have any feelings for her. What do you do?
Hmm, this is a difficult situation. A peculiar mess indeed as it is said. Continuing with things as they are is not really tenable. I’d find a way to seek professional help for the girl, she clearly has severe abandonment issues and needs help. I’ll stay with her as a friend and try to convince her to get therapy, but I’ll gently explain that I am not ready for a relationship.