Letters from God

Welcome to the second episode in the relationship series. We hope the letters from God series helps you in your relationships.

Feelings Real or Fickle?
by Adetokunbo Adeoye

Just because you have feelings for someone doesn\’t mean you really love the person. Your feelings for the individual may have been purely sexual or chemical-biochemically induced. In other words, you were not in love but in lust—or you may have just been infatuated.

Please don\’t get me wrong; I strongly believe that you will have feelings for whomever God has for you; in fact, I believe He\’ll see that you do. Nevertheless, love is not based solely on emotions. Just because you have feelings does not mean you are in love; however, when you are in love you will have feelings.

Feelings are fickle. Sometimes you feel good and sometimes you feel bad. Feeling bad about a relationship that you felt good about previously does not mean that you cannot love your mate anymore. I am in no way advocating that anyone stay in a tumultuous relationship. I am rather deliberating on situations where the baby of love is thrown out with the dirty baby bath water of feelings.

You should not stop loving just because you are not \”feeling it.\” Jesus was not \”feeling it\” in the garden of Gethsemane prior to going to the cross. He opted for a way out of dying for us, but his love for us, which was not based on his distressing feelings, overcame his distraught emotions, endured his melancholy, and never gave up.

He didn\’t abort His mission for giving us life just because He didn\’t feel like it. He sacrificed Himself as He endured long and hard from the time they spat on Him, beat Him, ripped His flesh apart with whips and a crown of thorn on His head, until He said, \”It is finished.\”

I believe emotions have a place in our expression of love; however, they are not love, but a means of expressing love. I also believe that you should be attracted to your mate, but just because you are attracted to someone does not mean you\’re in love with the individual. You might just be attracted to the individual superficially.

Adam and Eve
In any case, I still believe that you should be attracted to whomever God gives you. There is no doubt in my mind that Adam was attracted to Eve. After God created Adam, I noticed he didn\’t say much except to give names to the animals.

But when Eve showed up, the cat that got his tongue suddenly vamoosed! All of a sudden, the poet in Adam resurrected himself as he declared her bone of his bones and flesh of his flesh.

Kind of sounds like what a guy will do when he sees a lady he is attracted to. All of a sudden he wants to talk to her. All of a sudden, many a man\’s morality commits suicide as it flies out the window! Maybe Adam\’s attraction to Eve contributed to his disobedience.

I often wondered what Adam was thinking when he blatantly disobeyed God. God hooked him up big time. God created him, breathed life into him, and gave him a job as the COO while He remained as the CEO of the Garden of Eden. He also gave him a wife. God gave him an instruction, a simple uncomplicated instruction, which was to stay away from the tree of the knowledge of good and evil.

What on earth would make a guy disobey such a God given order? A beautiful woman! Kind of makes sense. You know how some guys begin to act when they see an attractive lady. Some begin to act like they have no morals.

Perhaps when Adam saw Eve, he was so taking by her beauty and uniqueness that he voluntarily forgot what God instructed him not to do. After all, he was standing right there when the devil tempted Eve (Gen. 3:6).

Since he was with her, then he must have been present when the devil coerced Eve to eat the fruit from the forbidden tree. Perhaps Adam had a point when God called him on the carpet. Absolutely not a valid point, but a point nevertheless (Gen. 3:12).

In essence, and in his defense, he blamed Eve and God for his transgression. He may have been saying that it was Eve\’s fault because she looked so h-h-hot! That she melted the commandment God gave him to oblivion.

I hope you\’re not taking my version of this story too seriously. All I\’m trying to stress is that God will give you someone that you are attracted to. Sometimes you may not be attracted to the person at first, but as you yield to God\’s purpose and begin to see through His eyes, you may be overwhelmed by the glamour He places before you.